About a year ago, while getting sucked down the Facebook rabbit hole, I landed on this video of a woman ranting about the pressure to physically look perfect; And then she referred to Petticoat Lane as two shower curtains flapping in a tornado.
Hand to God, I laughed so hard I fell off of the sofa.
Then I laid of the floor and laughed for another good 10 minutes with tears rolling down my face.
She’d delivered the point brilliantly.
Societal stereotypes and outright comments had made her feel like there was something wrong with her.
I wasn’t laughing at her. I was laughing with her, and her brilliant humor.
Guys, it’s up to you to tell your lady that real men eat dinner rolls.
We’ve all heard some crass men talking about roast beef sandwiches, and you know they dang sure aren’t talking about running through the Arby’s drive-thru.
I’ll bet I was 30 years old before I learned that women were having plastic surgery on those lips.
Ah, the pursuit of perfection, huh?
It sounds like a dang Lexus commercial.
Let me just let you in on a little secret here, ladies:
Real men don’t expect perfection. Real men love you because you’re you, not because your pink panther is visual perfection.
In fact, I’m even going to go so far as to say that real men don’t care what the flowerpot looks like, as long as they are the only ones planting the seeds.
It’s a real snake charmer!
Real men eat dinner rolls, and they love it.
There are quite a few different names for the ultimate taco that doesn’t come with a free chalupa and a Mountain Dew.
Maybe yours does…?
As long as there’s not an all-night drive-thru, real men don’t care.
The days of Monica telling Rachel about her “flower” are long gone, don’t you agree?
Sure, there are lots of cutie-pie names for Ward’s true favorite beaver, and a lot of them are just flat-out funny.
And let’s face it; Pretty much anything is better than the correct term. We could have done way better, when we named this particular piece of equipment, in my humble opinion.
I’ve been told that there are both men and women that don’t like to talk about enjoying the breakfast of champions, let alone get up close and personal with an upright wink.
How is it that we can be seemingly be so open about literally opening Pandora’s box, and yet so closed off when it comes to talking about the downtown Golden Palace?
They are the very same thing!
A male friend of mine once told me, “You girls are all sitting on a pot of gold, and you don’t even know it,” and it made me realize that he was spot on.
Honey pots of all sizes and shapes — outside of Ashdown Forest — seem to have a magical, irresistible affect.
Once again, guys, it’s up to you to convey to your lovely girl that real men truly enjoy eating dinner rolls.
Let’s face it, the road to Mount Pleasant (shout out to my Michigan peeps!) isn’t always one covered in roses that ends with a 40-year, happily-married ending.
However, it is usually one that ends at the banana basket on a Friday night.
And if you’re lucky, a second round, and breakfast, on a Saturday morning, if both parties are feeling it.
Well, if the vertical smile puts a smile on both of your faces, then what difference does it make?
There is nothing taboo about being a dew-flap enthusiast!
A real man is going to love eating your dinner roll at the Golden Arches, whether you think it looks like shower curtains or not.
Remember, turnabout is fair play. Just ask Grady.